Damn you, Lifetime casting agents!

Excuse me for a moment while I geek out about something completely ridiculous.

Fact: I read Nora Roberts books. Yeah, yeah, insert judgment and mockery here.

Fact: Lifetime has been making a good number of Nora Roberts books into TV movies. Which is kind of cool, because I like movies made from books I like, even if they're kind of crappy.

Where am I going with this?

Someone over at Lifetime is a complete moron who has no interest in being true to the books they're converting to film.

Here's the thing that severely pisses me off:

In Northern Lights, the most recent of Roberts' books to be made into a film, the female character, Meg, is a feisty bush pilot. She has BLACK hair and blue eyes and is quite exotic, is standoffish and super independent, doesn't take any crap from anyone, and is 200% able to take care of herself. A good part of her background/character is that she strongly identifies with the Native culture in Alaska.

And who do they cast as Meg in the movie?

Fucking Leann Rimes.

Are you kidding me? Could they have picked a more generic, blonde, absolutely the opposite from the character in the book "actress" to play this part? Leann Rimes is not "tough." She's not "feisty." She is soft and silly.

I am already irritated with this movie, and am pissed off at Lifetime for making it impossible for me to enjoy a movie that I should have gotten at least a little entertainment from by so massively messing up their casting.

Hell, even JEWEL would have been better! Sure, she's still blonde, but at least she's actually been to Alaska before!

Also, upon more research, it seems like they also changed the following details:
- the main character's last name is "Burns" instead of "Burke" <-- WHY? Burke is much better.
- instead of having two huskies, Meg has pitbulls. In Alaska. Really? Which dog makes better sense?

Ugh. So disappointing.

I shake my fist at you, Lifetime!

I shake my fist at you, License to Wed!

I hate this movie. And, I hate that I hate this movie. I had high hopes for this movie. I usually love romantic comedies. I absolutely adore John Krasinski. I enjoy Mandy Moore. I can even tolerate Robin Williams. It was directed by Ken Kwapis, who is a GREAT director. But this movie? One of the worst movies, ever. And it's been on HBO for the last couple weeks, where I am unable to look away!

I think the biggest deal breaker for me? You feel so sympathetic to John Krasinski's character that you want to jump into the movie screen and tell him to run. Run far away, and never look back. Because that chick? SHE IS INSANE. All Mandy Moore's character does is whine and moan. She gets angry with him for the dumbest things, and the worst part is that at the end of the movie, HE is the one who has to apologize. HE is the one who has to make the grand gesture to get her back. WTF? All HIS character did wrong in the film was want to marry a selfish and obnoxious woman.

The entire movie is based off of the fact that this stupid woman (1) set a wedding date for 3 weeks away, and (2) also agreed to a ridiculous "wedding course" without even TALKING to her fiance! WHAT? No one would do that!

Plus, she's so hung up on the wedding vows, what the shit is that? Him not writing anything down in a freaking notebook doesn't mean that he doesn't want to marry her! UGH. He proposed, didn't he?

And Robin Williams' character? Bothered me so much that I wanted to scream. I was literally sitting in the theater about to pull my hair out because he was driving me that crazy. No reverend would be that invasive of privacy, or put people through anything like that.

I'm all about suspending my disbelief, but this one is WAY too over the top. Do yourself a favor - if you haven't seen this movie, SKIP IT.

Badly done, License to Wed, badly done.

Note to self: Finish writing screenplay, because if that shit can be produced, I should be a millionaire by now.

Is there anyone out there who actually liked this movie?