Wednesday, April 30, 2008

I think I actually hate Westlake.

I think I may have mentioned before that I hate driving through Westlake. People there are super snobby and self entitled, and it shows in their driving. And it's getting progressively worse, but that's an entire other story.

Back to the original reason for my post. I was driving home today, and was in about mile 6 of my 40 mile drive when a black Nissan Murano cut me off (without using his blinker, of course). Now, I was early in my drive, so this only mildly annoyed me - I just shook my head in annoyance, switched lanes myself (using my blinker, of course) and continued on my way.

Traffic wasn't BAD, but it was rough enough, and I still made ok time to get home. But then a dude on a motorcycle started doing all these tricks and fancy maneuvers IN THE MIDDLE OF TRAFFIC, and I started to get more irritated. And then it happened.

The same black Nissan Murano did the same thing again! And this time it was worse! He comes out of nowhere, swervs into my lane, then slams on his breaks, because, hi, we were in traffic and he needs to stop! This time, I got really mad. Not road-rage-pull-out-a-gun mad or anything, but definitely shake-my-fist-at-you mad (I really did shake my fist at him).

I changed lanes again because my exit was coming up and watched as he did the same thing to at least three other cars. At this point, my anger got the best of me and I sped up to see who the heck this guy is. And it's this douche-bag looking middle aged man, talking on his stupid little Bluetooth, not paying attention to a damn thing around him.

And what exit did he get off on? That's right, Westlake Blvd.

Friday, April 25, 2008

American Airlines strikes again.

Two months ago, I swore that I would not be flying American Airlines in the future, due to their deplorable behavior during our lost luggage debacle.

I knew I would have to use them at least once more when I used the $175 travel voucher they tried to placate us with, but I also knew I would be booking direct flights... Well, the time came to book with them again yesterday, when Kellie and I bought tickets for Ashleigh's wedding (and our road trip) in October.

We decided to fly into Boston, and then out of Washington DC, and found the flights we wanted. $369 round trip, including all taxes and fees and everything. But when I tried to book, what happened?

I couldn't use my voucher online. You have to make your reservations over the phone in order to use the voucher.

And what happens when you make your reservation over the phone? They charge you an additional $15 "service" fee.

What the shit is that???? You lose my luggage. Then you're total and complete assholes about the fact that you lost my luggage. Then, after months of complaints and being tossed around, you try to "make good" by giving me a voucher for less than half of what I paid for you to lose my luggage in the first place! Then, when I try to use that voucher, I have to PAY TO USE THE VOUCHER!

I am sooo pissed off about this, I can't even tell you. I shake my fist (repeatedly) at American Airlines, their stupid bleeding of their customers, and their absolutely awful customer service. Once this flight is over, I will be doing everything in my power to not support them.

Wednesday, April 23, 2008


The other day, someone called a bomb threat in to my office after hours. They got our reception voicemail, and left a menacing message - but ruined their chances of being taken seriously by laughing at the end of it. Of course, our company still couldn't take it lightly, so everyone was evacuated, and we were herded to the end of our block while the cops were called and the buildings were searched.

It turned out that there was not, in fact, a bomb in our building.

But while investigating, the cops discovered that the message had been left by a cell phone. Which leads me to ask the question - HOW STUPID ARE YOU? What is going through your tiny little peanut of a mind to call in a BOMB threat, which is a felony, by the way, from your PERSONAL phone?

This seriously has to be one of the dumbest things I've ever heard, and it just makes me mad. Not only was my office threatened and disrupted, but the person who did it wasn't even smart enough to call from a freaking pay phone or something.


Monday, April 21, 2008

I hate you, Ticketmaster!

On Saturday morning, I got up at ten minutes to 10am for the specific purpose of buying tickets for myself and five other people for the John Mayer show in July. I'd looked at tickets the night before and was ready. I had my credit card, I had the sections we wanted to sit in, I was set. I was on the site by 9:59am, and as soon as I was able, I started the process.

The "best" tickets I could find? In the third section, instead of the first, as we'd all planned. I was fully ready to purchase the more expensive tickets, but where were they? The pre-sale couldn't possibly have gotten them all, right? They don't even let that happen. And why was everything sold out before the clock even turned to 10:01am???

Then I thought - it has to be the size group that we have. So I tried searching for three people. I tried searching for two people. I even tried searching for just one! And the closest I could get was two pit tickets on AUCTION for $130.

We ended up sucking it up and getting the cheaper seats on the third level, because everyone still wanted to go. And then the freaking fees started.

We bought $55 tickets, and each of them ended up costing $75. That's almost 37% in FEES! I should have called the venue directly, or spent the two hours it would have taken me to drive down and buy them. But who knows if the tickets would still be available?

It's this outrageous catch-22, and Ticketmaster is very aware and exploits it. And that makes me so mad! I always knew that Ticketmaster was a sell out. But this is ridiculous.

Definition of a tool.

Spotted in Camarillo over the weekend. You have GOT to be kidding me. Soo ridiculous. My hatred of Hummers knows no bounds, but this tops the cake. And the driver? Yeah, he was in his 50's, and a total toolish poser. Ugh. No.

Friday, April 18, 2008

Attention co-workers.

Attention co-workers:

While it is perfectly acceptable to play music at your desk during the day, please keep it to a reasonable volume. If I am sitting at my desk more than 30 feet away, I should not be able to hear your weird music as if you were next to me with a boombox on your shoulder. Turn it down, or put on some damn headphones!

Also, even though I might not recognize the music you are playing, I do recognize when you play the same song numerous times.

Wednesday, April 16, 2008

Thanks for using your blinker, a-hole.

One of my biggest pet peeves about driving is those people out there who feel that they are above using their blinker. The "my car is better than yours, and you wouldn't dare hit me anyway" people. I come into contact with these types of people a lot living in the Oak Park/Westlake area, and they seriously make me want to lose my shit.

Listen up, people. You're a shitty driver if you don't use your blinker. I can forgive people who occasionally forget. Even people who look extremely distracted by children. But you? Being on your stupid little bluetooth thing does not excuse you. Neither does taking a swig from your $8 bottle of water.

Weaving in and out of traffic without your blinker is even worse. What could you possibly be thinking? Where do you expect to get? If you haven't noticed, we're sitting in traffic, and your manic switching of lanes without your blinker is not helping anything.

I have much more to say on this topic, but I can't concentrate on being cranky right now because I'm watching Juno on DVD and it's making me happy.

Friday, April 11, 2008

Seriously, that's gross.

Seriously disgusting. Our microwave at work, with some kind of meat sauce so caked on that I couldn't scrape it off with a napkin. This is not ok. I don't understand why it's so hard to take the extra second to clean up after yourself. You're not THAT busy, and you're not THAT important.

Thursday, April 10, 2008

What's the point?

What is the point of starting a conversation with me, if you're just going to walk away in the middle of my response when something else comes along? How freaking rude are you, anway??? I seriously hope that you don't do that at home, because it's really annoying. I shouldn't even engage in conversations anymore... but if you're lingering in front of my desk, what choice do I have? I'm aware you don't give a shit about my opinions, but you could at least try to be polite about it.

I shake my fist at you, lady.

Who'd have thunk it?

So, THAT'S what happens to all of your stuff when it's permanently lost by airlines! They freakin' hold onto it, then SELL IT! Since American Airlines lost my bag on the way to my vacation in February, I've been overly interested in what happens to the lost/missing bags. I finally have my answer! Here's an article from Budget Travel about how and where you can buy "leftover loot" from the TSA. Ok, so it's mostly stuff confinscated by the TSA, but still. After reading it, I discovered the Oregon State Surplus site, as well as the Oregon State eBay store.

And, just to keep me entertained, I read this article called "Confessions of a Baggage Handler." I blame miscommunication and stupid American Airlines for the "misplacement" of our bags. Yeah, for seven weeks? Suck it.

I shake my fist at you, baggage handlers and TSA!

Shut up, Foo Fighters!

I am beginning to hate all of the radio stations in LA. For the most part, the three radio stations I listen to the most (when I'm not jumping on my iPod or listening to a CD) are KROQ, Star, and Jack FM. And there has been this epidemic of my radio stations overplaying Foo Fighters and Red Hot Chili Peppers. It is REALLY starting to bug me.

It seems like every time I turn the radio on it's one of the two bands. And guess what, radio stations??? I don't mind them, but we want to hear other stuff! It's gotten to the point where I would rather listen to a commercial than stay on a station with the Foo Fighters or Red Hot Chili Peppers playing on it.

I don't want to hear Dave Grohl's whining, or hear RHCP's attempted ripoff of Tom Petty. And I REALLY don't want to hear them 15 times an hour.

I shake my fist at you, Foo Fighters & Red Hot Chili Peppers!

Wednesday, April 9, 2008

Attention co-workers.

Attention co-workers:

(1) If you are in need of a cup, and there are none on the counter, they can be found in the cabinet below. Also, if you go to grab one from there, it is perfectly acceptable to put more on the counter where you know they should be.

(2) If you are in need of more napkins, and you are going to take the time to open a new package of them, feel free to put more out for everyone to enjoy.

(3) If there are two trash recepticles available, and one is clearly marked "Recycling ONLY: Bottles and Cans," this is not the one in which to place the trash from your salmon lunch.

(4) The proper proceedure for using individual creamers is as follows - open creamer, dump into coffee, place empty creamer container in TRASH CAN. (note: the counter is not a trash can, and therefore, empty creamers should not be left there)

(5) If you place a dirty dish in the sink, it is yours to wash. Unfortunately, our budget does not run to kitchen help, and we are left to our own devices to keep it clean. In addition, dirty dishes left in the sink for more than two weeks will be thrown away, due to the mold and filfth that is now coating them.

Thank you.

Not in the office!

Here's a tip for all you office 9-5ers out there:

If you want to eat fish for lunch, COOK IT ELSEWHERE. It is NOT cool to go into an office building that has no windows that open, and recycled air, and stink up the entire place with your re-heated fish. I don't care what kind of fish it it. I don't care if it is healthy for you. Neither of these things keep it from smelling horribly. The bottom line is that you are torturing people with the stinky, disgusting smell of your food.

Because here's the thing. You heat up your food, and then take it outside, or take it to your office. We sit out here. In the open. No office doors to block exterior smells. And your fish? That shit lingers. I could go to lunch, pass a skunk and a garbage landfill, and still come back to an office that smells worse than the bottom of a trash can at the marina.

No offense, but...

Disclaimer: Attention friends of mine that are getting married - this isn't about you.

I've been looking at wedding stuff a lot in the last few months and a few things have come to my attention that make me mad.

I am soooo sick to death of all of the things that are "required" for weddings these days! I mean, it's cool to have parties and celebrations, but why do they all require me to spend excessive amounts of money on you? Engagement parties, bridal showers, more bridal showers, bachelorette parties, weddings.

And sooo many people aren't satisfied unless people spend at LEAST $25 on a gift. They fully EXPECT people to bring them all this stuff that they may never even use. The smart, crafty ones register for cash, trips, or stuff they can turn into cash or use on trips. The extravagant ones expect numerous sets of silver and china, and furniture that will never fit in their 800 sq. foot one bedroom.

And THEN, if you mention all the showers or whatnot they're having, they make some offhand quip about "well, we ARE paying for all of you to come to the wedding." Like I asked you to find the most expensive place in the world to get married. Like I told you, "yes, please, I want you to spend $700 on me!" Here's an inside tip: We don't care where you get married. You could get married at a public park and we'd still be as happy as we'd be at that fancy country club.

The flip side is that I love weddings. I love the celebration of people who love each other, and when it comes to my close friends, I love to buy them stuff. I have no problem getting a gift for the couple, a gift for my friend. But my friends are reasonable. Most other people? Not so much.

Maybe it's just something I don't understand completely, since I'm not engaged or planning a wedding. Maybe it's some mindset that you snap into when you decide to get married. "This is about ME" or something. But give me a break. Yes, your wedding is important. But it's not an excuse to bleed people dry.

In a way, I blame reality television and the Internet. I know that's kind of lame, but it's true if you think about it. People are exposed to all these SUPER expensive parties and weddings, and begin to think that it's normal to spend $40,000+ on a single day. Here's a thought: Elope, buy a house with that $40,000 you just happened to have laying around, and then have a party there.

I have four weddings to go to this year. Four. And one of them is on the other side of the country. And, granted, I am really excited for all of them. But, these weddings? On top of all the birthdays, the graduation, and the freaking holidays. I apologize in advance, because you are all getting handmade presents for Christmas this year.

Also, here's my promise to you. When I get married, I won't have an engagement party. I won't have bridesmaids, so my friends won't have to spend money on a dress and shoes they're never going to wear again. My bachelorette party will be as close to free as I can get it to be, so that people can actually go to it and not worry about making that month's rent. And if I do have a shower (or showers, because let's admit it, there are lots of people around who want to celebrate with you when you get married, plus, I'm Italian, so there's really no way of avoiding multiple showers), I'm totally down with 10 people chipping in on a $100 gift card for the spa. Once. Not multiple times. Coming to more than one shower does not mean buying more than one gift.

You will not have to break the bank for my wedding. Deal?

Tuesday, April 8, 2008

A place for rants...

There are tons of things that irritate me to no end, so I've decided to create a blog to house them all!